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Lessons As A First Time Stay At Home Mom

Lessons As A First Time Stay At Home Mom

being a stay at home mom sucks…you are constantly cleaning the house, picking up after your kids, you get emotionally and physically drained every day and you never get alone time.

Now I know what you may be thinking. This is all pretty negative and sounds like I just don’t like being a stay at home mom or even a mom at all. But the truth is. That is completely UNTRUE!

I absolutely love being a mother and I am so grateful that I am able to stay home with my child. To show you how much I love being a mother I want to tell you a story of a little girl.

Once upon a time, there was a little girl who for every Christmas asked for a baby doll. She did not want any ordinary baby doll she wanted a crying, popping, laughing baby doll. Every year on Christmas she would open her baby doll present to find just an ordinary plastic baby doll.

Sure if she tilted the head forward and back the eyelids would open and close, or she would give it a bottle to find that it did pee but none of the hundreds of baby dolls she got could satisfy what she truly wanted.

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Then one year for Christmas she begged and begged her parents to get her real baby doll. And what her mother said after crusted her heart. She said “Honey you won’t get to have a real baby doll until you are older” This little girl did quite understand what her mother meant but she learned to love and enjoy her ordinary baby dolls.

Fast forward 11 years that little girl on July 22, 2017, finally got the real baby doll she always wanted.

As you can see I have always wanted to be a mom. But being a mom is not always the easiest.

Life as a stay at home is fun, crazy, hard, and draining but brings amazing satisfaction. Now not every mother wants to be a stay at home mom and guess what? that is totally fine! being a stay at home mom is not for everyone.

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However, If you are struggling with being a stay at home mom or wondering if you would like to stay home then I want to give you some hardcore truths. From one stay at home mom to another.

Lessons As A First Time Stay At Home Mom

  • Learn To Love The Mess

I am a very clean person and really don’t like a messy house but I have learned that you sometimes have to let the mess happen. There have been many times that I am working on something and my daughter is pulling the paper out of the desk onto the floor.

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Yes, this is my daughter’s paper mess one day

I would keep trying to clean it up to only have it happen again and again and she would start throwing a fit. So I gave into the mess because it was the only thing that would keep her occupied and happy.

You don’t have to constantly have a messy house and one thing I have done is that after she was done playing in her mess we would clean it up.

  • Accept That This Is Motherhood

This is probably one of the biggest lessons I’ve learned. Motherhood doesn’t mean that you need to feel worn down 24/7 or that you can never do the things you love. Before I truly accepted the ways of motherhood I was really stressed and sad.

But I learned to accept that it might take me longer to get out the door or that I will have to wake up in the middle of the night and I can do the things I want to do It just might take more time. Being a stay at home mom does not mean that you can’t do the things you want to do.

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  • Find Ways To Make Hard Days Fun

We have all had those days where your child is clingy, fuzzy and it takes a big tole on you. Those days you just want 5 minutes alone of peace and quietness. Learning to have patience is really hard sometimes and patience is what is required for your children especially when you are home all day with them.

The days where we are just having a bad day I have found out that if I find ways to have fun during the bad days that I am a lot more patient and I don’t let the stress or emotions of feeling worked up creep in.

Try walking away from the situation and take three deep breaths to calm your emotions down because when you are both worked up more often than not the situation goes south.  You might need to get out of the house and have a change of scenery! Sometimes to get a break we will walk outside to get the mail or just be outside for a bit and even doing that makes such a difference!

  • Give Yourself Credit

Being a stay at home mom is a job and a hard one. Give yourself credit for the to-do list you accomplished or if you handled a situation awesome then give yourself credit! I use to just go through the motion of my to do list and life until my husband helped me to see that I was not giving myself credit.

Now whenever I get the dishes done, or I finally get my child to sleep after hours of crying I give myself credit for what I just did and MAN just being aware of the small things I do every day and creating the sense of accomplishments I have become such a happier stay at home mom!

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  • Not All Days Are Good Days

Being a stay at home mom you just have to realize that not all days are going to be good days. Children have emotions, frustrations and even wake up on the wrong side of the bed just like us adults do sometimes.

On these bad days are a great time to teach your children how to cope with their emotions. Again try to make bad days fun days. When my daughter is just having a really tough day I work really hard on not letting her emotions affect me. I try to stay happy and positive and I am not perfect so it doesn’t work 100% of the time but It does work a lot of the time.

  • Find Times To Get Out Of The House

Holy Moly! you know how I mentioned earlier when I said sometimes you just need to get out of the house? Well, I am saying it again! I am not kidding when I say getting out of the house can totally change attitudes and emotions. I try to get outside of the house at least once a day. Even on our good days, we get out of the house.

Even if it is to get the mail or to just be outside watching the cars drive by make such a difference. Being a stay at home mom you may feel cooped up sometimes and if you feel like that sometimes I would imagine that your kids to do. Take a break from your checklist and go enjoy some fresh air!

I totally get it being a stay at home mom is far from easy and we often don’t get enough credit for it. I am grateful that I have a husband that understands how hard it is to be home with our daughter all day. I have found that even though I am home with our child all day that I do have to do some things for myself and guess what!? that is this blog! This blog is what I do because I love it and I get to help other moms just like you.

I would not change anything because I love being home with our daughter. Being a stay at home mom is an amazing job to have! You might not get paid in money but the payment is the fulfillment of raising your children.

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Becca Wilson

Thursday 26th of April 2018

Learning to love the mess is probably one of the best things you can do! You will spend all day cleaning if you dont.


Wednesday 25th of April 2018

These are some very helpful tips for first-time moms! I can just imagine how challenging it would be!


Wednesday 25th of April 2018

Awe I love how optimistic you stay! It's so important to cherish the moments you have with your kids :)

David Allen Elliott

Wednesday 25th of April 2018

I definitely hear all of these things and how they are appropriate to motherhood. I don't think I would say love the mess though. I would say love the chaos. Things don't go as you would think and to accept that will make you feel so much better.

Flossie McCowald | SuperMomHacks

Tuesday 24th of April 2018

Oh my goodness YES!!! Unlike you, this is not the life I expected to have - I trained for a career I loved in many respects, but had to give it up (for lots of reasons) around the time I became a parent - but yes, hard work but SO worth it! :)