Are you tired of being on edge all the time? Do you feel like a bad mom because you’re always distracted and frazzled? So much of our lives revolve around being a mom, and we often forget about our own needs – not just for sleep or food but also for mental health and self-care.
If you wish to become calmer as a parent, then this video is for you. We are going to talk about how moms can be calm parents by doing these 10 things. Make sure to keep watching because you don’t want to miss tip #5.
1. Take Time To Refuel
From the moment you wake up until your head hits the pillow at night, it is go go go. Your schedule is jam-packed with to-dos such as taking the kids to school, soccer practice, dance practice, helping with homework, making dinner, and the list goes on and on. But before you go into a deep sleep, how do you refuel? You finally arrive home, exhausted and ready to crash.
A good way to relax is by taking time for yourself. Take time to refuel multiple times during your day. This means giving yourself a 5 or even 10-minute break to relax, breathe, and reset.
Doing this will help neutralize your energy and release any pent-up stress you may be caring about so that you can be calm throughout your entire day! The time allows you to relax instead of resorting to Netflix binges when things are tough. This allows you to go back into caring mode without feeling resentful about what needs to be done. This is beneficial for yourself, but it’s also good for the family because everyone will be happier in their own space.
2. Put Down The Phone
When it comes to parenting, moms can be their own worst enemy. As we try to juggle our careers and our families, the temptation of checking out by logging onto Facebook or scrolling through Instagram is just too great at times. Studies have shown that electronics can increase a stress hormone found inside our bodies called Cortisol.
This hormone is like an alarm system within your body, and it works with the body that controls our mood and other things such as fear and motivation.
The problem is that when we are in this state, it’s next to impossible for you to be at your best as a mom. It is easy for moms to feel overwhelmed by their responsibilities, such as balancing work life and home life while taking care of their kids. Mom’s don’t need the extra added stress of their phones. So during the day, put down the phone and take a few deep breaths, and take time to be with yourself without a phone.
3. Get More Sleep
Sleep deprivation is a major problem for mothers. We are so sleep-deprived that we can’t remember the last time we got a good night’s sleep, and it really shows in our day-to-day lives. When you don’t get enough sleep, your mood drops, your energy levels plummet, and you become less patient with everyone around you – especially your children. It doesn’t have to be this way!
The first step in getting a better night’s rest is by going to bed earlier or taking power naps during the day! Try this for at least one week before deciding if it works for you! It will make such a big difference in how calm you are throughout your day with children.
4. Wake Up Before Your Kids
Waking up before your kids seems like a daunting task, but it can actually benefit both you and them. You’ll have more time to get ready in the morning and avoid rushing to get out the door on time. Wake up early enough so that you can exercise or read a book while your children are still asleep, which will help calm down any anxiety you may feel as a parent.
This will also set a good example for your children. They’ll see that it’s important to get up early and be productive, which may lead them to follow in those footsteps!
If you’re struggling to find time to get up early, set a reminder on your phone or start getting into the habit of setting the alarm. You’ll soon notice that it becomes easier and more natural as you wake up every morning before your kids!
Plus, when you have some time to yourself before facing your day, you will be more calm and confident as a parent.
5. Discover Your Triggers
We all have triggers that can affect our moods, emotions, and behavior. The problem is that most parents don’t know what their triggers are, so they never get to work on them.
The first step is identifying the three biggest things that set you off or make you feel negative emotions like anger, sadness, fear, etc. You’ll do this by listing all of the feelings that you are feeling. For example:
I feel ________, when _______.
Anger: When I asked my children to do something, they didn’t listen to me.
– Sadness: When I cannot fully enjoy time with my children because they have a meltdown.
– Anxious When there is a lot of chaos in the house, it’s hard to find things or keep up with everything that needs to be done.
Once you’ve identified your top three triggers, identify what needs of yours are not getting met. An example of a trigger could be that you feel anxious because there is a lot of chaos in the house. You may be having a hard time trying to find things and keep up with everything that needs to be done. The need that isn’t getting met could be that you’re feeling out of control.
The next step would be figuring out why this particular need isn’t being met and how to meet this need while still respecting your children’s needs.
When you can identify your triggers, what needs are not getting met, and meet your needs, you will find that you are much calmer as a parent because you can prepare yourself before you become triggered.
6. Don’t Take Things Personally
It can be easy to take things personally when your children do or say hurtful things as a parent. It is important to understand that this is not their intention. They are just reacting to big emotions, and they don’t always know how to handle them in the best way possible.
It is tough to manage your children’s behaviors if you feel personally offended by their misbehavior. It is important for parents not to take things personally to avoid the pitfalls of believing that their children are trying to hurt them on purpose.
This doesn’t mean shoving your feelings down inside or ignore inappropriate behaviors. Still, parents can not effectively discipline, come up with punishments, or enforce other consequences when riding this crazy strong ride of emotions.
What can help parents when they’re faced with these difficult situations? Parents need a plan! A strategy, if you will.
First, try using humor as much as possible when your child might feel emotional or start to show behaviors that could become problematic (i.e., whining). This may sound silly at first, but it helps defuse some pressure from both parties involved before it gets too intense.
Second, walk away from the situation if you can and take time to cool off before addressing the situation.
Most importantly: Don’t take anything personally! It doesn’t matter if they’re mad at you because you won’t let them play with electronics after dinner. It also doesn’t matter if they want something and know deep down that you have no intention of giving in — kids say mean things all the time without meaning it (even though we feel those words deeply). The best thing you can do as a parent is to let go of your ego long enough to realize this lesson yourself.
Overscheduling and clutter can create a ticking time bomb. Having too many items on your to-do list or having way too much stuff, such as toys, can make parents and children feel very anxious.
To simplify your home, schedule, and life so that you and your children will feel calmer! You can do this by taking a look at your day and see what is not necessary and either remove it from your schedule completely or limit how often this item needs to be done.
Second, look around your house and get rid of what you no longer need. A good rule of thumb is if you haven’t touched it or used it once in the last 6 months, throw it out.
The same goes for toys. There was a study done from the University of Toledo in Ohio, and it suggests that having too many toys can reduce the quality of a child’s play and that having fewer toys can actually lead to a child having a more focused and deeper play experience because they are engaging in more creative and imaginative ways.
Third, set your intentions to be calmer and more present in the day-to-day. The key is simplicity. When you simplify your life, you will be calmer and happy as a parent raising calm and happy children.
9. Nourish YOUR NON-MOM IDENTITY
As a mom, it’s so easy to get caught up in “mom” mode. You’re always on the go with your kids, and you never have any time for yourself. But what happens when you finally find that precious free time?
Your mind goes blank because all of the things that come to mind are only related to being a mom, and none of them are about who you were before becoming one. That can be really hard on moms because they start feeling like they don’t know themselves anymore without their kids around constantly.
Make time to do something that you used to love or still love but seem never to have enough time for it and don’t feel guilty about doing something you love, such as joining a book club, scheduling a night out with friends once a week, joining a dance or art class. Do something you love outside of “mom” mode because you are much more than just a mom!
You deserve it!
Nourish YOUR NON-MOM IDENTITY
What You Should Do Next
Check Out These Blog Post:
Subscribe To My Newsletter
Follow Me On Social Media
Get daily parenting tips to help you become the parent you want to be and be surrounded by other amazing mothers like you! Come and follow me on social media!
Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dollarmommyclub/
Learn More About Group Coaching
Do you want to dive deeper into your parenting journey and become the parent you want to be even quicker? Come and join me and other amazing mothers who want to learn how to become the parent they have always dreamt of becoming. You will be surrounded by love, support and will be able to make connections with other like-minded mothers.
Please email me at firstname.lastname@example.org